Empress, you don’t impress me much
When I decided to begin this quest, one thing was certain, Empress Chili was to be the first stop on the tour. If Cincinnati chili is a church, then Empress is the rock upon which it is built. Or, in another failed analogy, all chili roads lead to Empress. When the brothers Kiradjieff came to Cincinnati from Macedonia in the early 1900s, they could not have imagined what they would spawn. Setting up shop next to the Empress Theater in downtown Cincinnati, Tom and John Kiradjieff created Cincinnati-style chili with their proprietary blend of spices, based loosely off cultural dishes of their Grecian home. Over time more and more parlors popped up in the style of Empress, many of whom can directly trace their lineage through the kitchen staff and flavors of Empress. Given the fact that Empress was once the Chili King, and its recipe has remained unchanged since 1922, I was very excited to experience the restaurant.
In a somewhat bitter twist of irony, Cincinnati’s original chili parlor is now one of the furthest indie chili restaurants from the hub of the city. Located in Alexandria, Kentucky, the lone remaining Empress sits, unassuming, on the side of a four lane road. Driving up, I was pleasantly surprised by the aesthetic of the building: the sign has a timeless elegance to it, and it melds with the brick facade of the building very nicely. The facade is where the pleasantness ends, however.
The interior of the parlor is strange, more reminiscent of a 1990s fast-food chain than a chili institution. Rather than sit down, order, and be waited on, Empress Chili in Alexandria is a counter order restaurant. Like a typical fast food chain, one orders off the menu board at the counter, then stands off to the side and waits for his/her food to take it to his/her table. This was quite a shock to me, and frankly upsetting. One of they key elements of Cincinnati chili, in my opinion, is the parlor feel, where you can enjoy the meal with your friends and family. Empress failed to deliver in this respect. As many a Cincinnatian will tell you, Cincinnati chili is not the same “to-go” or made at home, and I suppose it also is not the same ordered as if it’s fast food.
Another source of frustration for me is the decor and marketing. Empress is the original Cincinnati chili, but you would be hard pressed to know it from a tour of the building. Besides one or two news clippings hanging up, and the sign on the building, a typical customer would have no idea the history that is infused within each bowl of chili served here, and that is truly a shame.
Now, for the chili.
Although I had some disappointment in the aesthetic and feel of the Empress Chili parlor, I do not have anything particularly bad to say about its chili. I ordered a regular five way and one chili cheese sandwich (they just call it a “chili cheese”). Strangely served on an eclectic combination of ceramic plates, cafeteria trays, and styrofoam cups, I was not sure what I had gotten myself in to. The oyster crackers were packaged – a big no-no in my book – and you were not even served them until you requested a pack. In addition, there was no unique hot sauce or bottle, simply your choice of Tabasco or Frank’s Red Hot. Despite these curiosities, the meal itself looked like what Cincinnati chili is supposed to look like, so I sat down to dig in.
The chili was…mild. I don’t want to use the word bland, although that’s what is coming up in my head. The usual battle between sweet, savory, and spicy that makes Cincinnati chili so enticing simply was not there. It was a bit on the meaty side, certainly less runny than some other options for the fare. The spaghetti on the 5-way was thick, almost more bucatini than spaghetti – not inherently an issue, but I think in some bites the chili got lost in the thickness of the pasta. The cheese was adequate, perhaps a thicker grating and a bit more sharpness would be appreciated, but it served its purpose just fine. The part of my meal that I did thoroughly enjoy was the chili cheese. The bun was absolutely lovely, pillowy soft and fresh, yet did not tear or soften from the chili. Again, in the sandwich I was left underwhelmed by the chili, and there was not nearly enough of it, but there were some bites that were fantastic. Let me be clear, I enjoyed my meal; as I said, there is nothing bad about the chili…there is just nothing particularly good about it either.
Empress was always going to have to be the first stop on my chili tour. I have been itching to go and try the original for years, and I am glad that I finally was able to visit and make my first chili pilgrimage to the first chili parlor. Look, maybe I am being a tad critical because I expected more from such a storied institution, but I digress… my final oyster cracker rating is below (out of five crackers).
The Great Cincinnati Chili Tour 